Have you ever found yourself in a situation that just isn’t working? This happens probably far more often than you want to think about. You find yourself unhappy and complaining, yet you put up with it and deny it isn’t working. Often people think, “It will get better when…”
Recently, I read an interesting article that made this top of mind. Research by a team of professors at Duke University’s Fuqua School of Business shows that people pick boring jobs over stimulating ones intentionally when they focus on pay and perceive that the more appealing job won’t compensate them enough for the effort it demands. They call it “effort aversion”. Many people who found themselves unemployed when the economy went sour did something similar to this, “settling” for a job just to have one. What happens over time (sometimes a very short time!) in these situations is that they find the job is just not working for them. Yet for a variety of reasons, some people will deny that it isn’t working and have reasons or excuses for the situation. They don’t face the facts and do not take appropriate action to change things. They remain miserable.
Can you relate to this? Are you in denial about what you would really like in your life? Do you have things in your life that aren’t working for you? A job, a career, a dysfunctional relationship, where you live or work, a boss, a business partner, a vendor, a client, a family member with an addiction?
Most people stay in denial and don’t deal with these things because of fear. They’re afraid to face the facts, fear if they did it could be worse, and dealing with it may be uncomfortable.
The first step to be successful in these situations is to face the fact that it isn’t working. The second step is to take action. The more you do this, the easier it gets.
Take action now! Make a list of what isn’t working in your life. Start with things that are important to you like things you usually make goals for, such as – relationships, finances, career, family time, health, appearance, and personal growth. Ask those close to you for input with questions such as:
What’s not working? How can we improve it? What do you need from me? What requests can I make? What actions to I/we need to take for this situation to work the way I/we would like?
Choose one action and do it. Then keep taking another action until you have resolved what isn’t working for you.
Sometimes people need help in this exploration. If that’s true for you, contact me. I’d love to help you explore and get into action! Lois@UnshackledLeaderhip.com