Do you ever think about what you’re doing, really?  Or for that matter, how you’re “being”? 


Recently, I heard someone ask a provocative question, “What would you like to stop doing?”  Really stop!  Make a list.  This was part of a series of questions about your life so you can see what you really want.  Interesting question. 


To get you going, here are some examples someone might say they would like to stop:

  • Procrastinating
  • Doing projects at the last minute
  • Being late
  • Not “investing” in themself (clothes, classes, working out) because they don’t have enough time, money………..
  • Cleaning my kids room
  • Criticizing direct reports, significant other, kids
  • Working late or on weekends
  • Opening email after 8 p.m.


Let’s expand this to include, “How would you like to stop “being”?  Make another list.

Here are some more examples:  I would like to stop being……….

  • Cranky in the morning
  • Fearful
  • Judgmental of others
  • Lazy
  • Concerned with what others think


I’m a firm believer in focusing on what you want.  So, now that you’ve created awareness of what you do and how you are being that you don’t want, take a look at that list.  What would you like to START doing/being?  Next to each item, write a “reframe” of the item to be what you DO want to do or “be”. 

For example:

Being late – Reframe: I arrive at least 10 minutes early for appointments

An empowering way to position this is to say, “In the past, I was often late.  Now I arrive at appointments at least 10 minutes early.”

Being fearful – Reframe:  I am courageous and love to try new things.  OR

Until now, I was fearful of many things.  Now, I’m courageous and love to try new things.


When you use the phrases, “In the past” or “Until now”, it’s a way of letting go of the old behavior or limiting belief and starting a fresh!


Give it a try!  Make your lists today and start living your life how you really want it to be!

Let me know what you think.  Lois@UnshackledLeadership.com 

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